That's pretty crazy. According to some policies, I'm not such a new immigrant anymore. My health insurance status changes. I think maybe my ATM fee is higher (in Israel, there are ATM fees even at your own bank. Banking here is hilarious.) And the organization that helped me come here will no longer call me once every two months to check on me.
But I definitely still feel new. My Hebrew is still just okay (though I think it is measurably stronger than a year ago, on all fronts), I still can't understand most jokes, I still miss laundry out of the dryer (hang drying clothes is not pastoral it's just annoying and my clothes get all crispy), and I still love eating in kibbutz dining halls, which everyone tells me will wear off. I think everyone is wrong. The thrill of communal schnitzel is FOREVER.
I thought about doing a big recap, and a big updates about my living and working and breathing and praying, but that feels exhausting so lets instead do...
10 HIGHLIGHTS OF MY FIRST YEAR AS AN ISRAELI
(In the order in which I remembered them, not necessarily significance.)
1) THAT TIME I TOOK ADVANTAGE OF BEING TEAR-GASSED
One time I went to the ministry of economy in Jerusalem to get a special paper I needed to work multiple jobs at the same time. Or something. I still don't understand that paper.
Ministries here have unpredictable hours, long lines, and lots of red tape. By the time I found where I was supposed to be, it was hopeless that I would get to the front of the line before the ministry closed.
EXCEPT THEN everyone around me starting sneezing. And coughing. And then one guy ran to a trash can and puked. And then more people puked and started running from the room.
I was miraculously unaffected, and seized my chance to race to the front of the line and ask for my paper.
Lady: ...the room is full of tear gas.
Ariane: Oh is that what it is?
Lady: Yes, you should evacuate.
Ariane: I want this paper that I need.
Lady: Are you serious right now?
Ariane: Yes.
Lady: Don't you want to come back another day?
Ariane: No, I never want to come back.
I got the mystery paper and I also found out I am inexplicably immune to tear gas. Not that I want to test that immunity. I'm not asking for trouble.
2) THAT TIME ROY AND I ROAD-TRIPPED NORTH FOR HIS BIRTHDAY
Roy is my amazing boyfriend/best-friend/pokemon hunting partner/fellow snack enthusiast. He turned 25 in November and I took him to a cute guest house in the north. It was gorgeous! We drove around. We looked at the Syrian border. We ate really good food. We wore matching robes around the guest house. We listened to classic American rock on the road.
3) THE BEST VALENTINE'S MEAL EVER
Speaking of Roy, we had our first date on Valentine's day, 2015. Which means that is also our anniversary. Which is nice because it's easy to remember and it saves money on fancy dinners. And this year we definitely had a fancy dinner. We went to Kitchen Market at the port and it was INCREDIBLE. It was a culinary EXPERIENCE. My favorite thing I ate, and really maybe the best thing I ate all year period, was this crazy egg in a jar. It was like... a soft boiled egg in a jar with... something else. Like corn something. I don't even know, and I didn't know then, I was just shocked by how overwhelmingly delicious it was and I will never forget our first anniversary because of how great Roy is and how great that egg was.
4) YEMINI'S WEDDING
Roy's friend Yemini got married last fall, and it was an amazing Israeli wedding. Huge and animated, with neon lights and fog machines and tons and tons of dancing. Lots of good friends and food and treats. Definitely a night to remember. Pre-wedding there was a henna ceremony, and here's a photo from that:
5) ULPAN ANTICS
"Ulpan" most of the time refers to an introductory Hebrew class immigrants take. It's also an introduction to Israeli culture. It's like an assimilation class. It REALLY wasn't for me - I don't learn languages well in a 50-person class or for 3.5 hours at night - so I only went for a few weeks. But it was a really funny and unique experience, being in a class with other immigrants from around the place. My teacher tended to make off-color remarks, which bothered me, but occasionally led to funny situations like this: (translated from Hebrew into English by me)
Teacher: I heard that Russians take a shot of vodka with black pepper when they have the flu.
Russian student: NO.
T: Really?
RS: NO. THAT'S INSANE. IT'S RED PEPPER.
6) MY DESENSITIZATION
Israeli warmth is a real thing. Israeli bravery is a real thing. Israeli hilarity is a real thing. Israeli rudeness is also a real thing. People are so rude! Although honestly, it's Americans in Israel who were collectively rudest to me over the last year. It used to hurt my feelings when people were rude. I used to carry it with me for a long time and fret about it. But now I just laugh when people are rude. People are ridiculous creatures. My stress levels are so much lower, it's amazing. Ah, rude people and their silly rudeness.
7) ISTANBUL
One perk about living in Israel is you can easily fly to many locations that are far from the States. Like how in March I went to Istanbul for a weekend with Sam. In all honesty, I was a cranky child for a lot of the trip because it was raining and sprained my ankle on the cobblestones. I'm sorry for that, Sam. But now that my ankle is better and it's not raining anymore I remember it as a great trip. What a cool city. What a HUGE city. I'm glad I saw it then, since things are pretty nuts there now. And it also made me appreciate Israel even more in contrast.
8) TEACHING AND LIVING IN JERUSALEM
Last summer I taught a public speaking course in Jerusalem, so I lived there for a month. I really love Jerusalem and I miss it, and it was a great way to start off my new life as an Israeli. There were tons of field trips and cool lectures, my students were lovely and amazing, I had an incredible mentor, really interesting faculty peers, and a great apartment in the center of town. I feel fondly about that time.
9) MY ABILITY TO SURVIVE
I've found lots of different types of employment. I've survived several illnesses, and the far more dangerous accompanying doctor's visits. I've signed contracts in Hebrew and so far there have been no surprises. I wrote 2 EU reports and an EU proposal and a million other documents. I didn't let a lot of people push me around. Sometimes, I did let people push me around and I still got through. I ate felafel every day for lunch for 3 months and lived to blog about it. I was lucky to have a lot of love and support from good friends in Israel, but still, I feel good about my resilience.
10) MY ALIYAH DAY
My friends came to the airport soooo early in the morning to meet me when I landed. And there was music and cake and balloons and there were tons of soldiers and speeches by politicians and cameras and free stuff and love and pride all over the place. What a remarkable day that was.
I think many olim (Jewish immigrants) here become disillusioned because this kind of celebration upon their arrival makes them think that their whole lives here will be in the same vein. But the big party is the start of being an Israeli, and being an Israeli means generally being underpaid, being in a lot of humidity, feeling jaded and unsurprised about terror, using a bomb shelters as a storage closet, having meaningful conversations with convenience store owners and cab drivers and randoms in line at the bank, eating fresh tahini with everything, playing with strangers' dogs on the beach, drinking water every second of every day and still being dehydrated, reading the Bible and then walking through a town that's in the Bible, feeling relieved to be a Jew, feeling not Jewish enough, wearing flip flops to work, realizing the most fun things to do are free (which is a good thing because no one has any money), learning that pharmacists know more than doctors a lot of times, going without frozen and canned food, never ever shoveling, eating 3x my weight in rice with raisins and almonds, not taking crap from anyone, laughing at yourself and everyone else all the time, sweeping out your apartment after a sand storm, learning the art of walking through puddles of air conditioner run-off without getting splashed on, and being able to comfortably disagree about politics and stay friends. The party is just the beginning.
